Yesterday I posted a Q & A with a new reader, Chuck, a charming gentleman who was seeking my marvelous advice as he was approaching a potential match via an online dating service. While I have no real fortune telling expertise, I was able to communicate with some spirits (no not alcohol, it wasn’t Beer:Thirty yet) to assist him as he was preparing to ask out this
Snap Dragon delicate flower that had captured his interest.
Last night (okay really dang early this morning) Chuck left another correspondence on my page, on that particular blog, that I feel I simply MUST reply too.
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You could not have provided more perfect insight into this woman’s availability, her first date preferences, and, most importantly, her willingness to go on a date with me. The stars were aligned as you predicted they would be. The out of commission crystal ball could not have been more fruitful. All Hail Marti without balls. But I digress…
I called her today for the first time and talked to her briefly. We quickly came to an agreement, as your suggestions hinted, to meet at a local venue during a time period you had suggested. That first call is always interesting. You never know what’s going to be on the other end… a southern drawl, jersey accent, valley girl, jive talk, or even worse, a WVU Mountaineer. You have to be ready for anything and be sure to point out nothing. Normally when calling and speaking to someone for the first time I simply state small, medium, or large, then toppings, and lastly crust type. But this call is different and an evening meal comparative is overly understated. This call could be the beginning of a significant life change. It holds untold opportunity. I won’t say my palms were sweating, but I do take the “first call” serious and given the gravity of it all, may have stammered more than once. As I recall, her voice was soft, contradicting the strength she projects in her online dating profile, however, she was decisive and her words were spoken with confidence. She had a happy, upbeat, and positive sounding voice. But the conversation did get a bit strange at times as sporadically her voice would change to what can only be described as a crying baby sound. I immediately started thinking about golf and bark collars, places that are quiet or things that make quiet… I certainly didn’t see that daydream coming right in the middle of this potentially life changing conversation. Any stammering may have been rooted in getting back to my original train of thought to ask this woman out and to firm up a place and time. The closing of the call was quite awkward also as she went full tilt into the crying baby voice again and I could tell from my view at the 7th tee that she was quite distracted. But all’s well that ends well and she and I are lined up…
At your pleasure, I may post from time to time to keep you updated on my progress.
Your grateful subject,
Dear, Sweet Chuck,
(Brings to mind Peppermint Patty, one of my favorites, talking to Charlie Brown. I’m totally cool like her but with blond hair)
I am flattered that I could be of assistance!
Ah yes, first calls can indeed be a tad intimidating. Sounds like you must have liked her voice. No doubt she was a bit nervous herself, worried you might think she sounded like Helga, the head warden at a woman’s prison. Hopefully when you meet in person she doesn’t actually resemble Helga! I am most certain that she found your voice quite pleasant, with a soothing quality about it. I just have insider scoops like that, I’m Marvelous after all. (Actually I tried to ‘look into things’ via the spirits this morning but she was singing along with PINK, poor creature really never will be able to pursue a singing career…the sounds coming from her throat were like nails on a chalk board, couldn’t stay connected to her, it was too painful so I’ll have to just give my opinion today)
Hmm…yes those first calls can be the beginning of a significant life change. Don’t down play the pizza call, honey, those can bring on significant life changes too, like clogged arteries, need for increased sizing in the rear cargo hold of one’s jeans, all sorts of dreadful side effects if one calls too often! Hmm…thinking that a supreme with a well done thin crust is sounding really yummy right now *stops to dial 347-1111*. Okay now where were we….oh yes…
My goodness, she cried? Perhaps it was tears of joy? Fear? Was she in pain? Then again perhaps she cares for those little carpet critters, Crumb Crunchers of the diapered variety? *bark collars? what kind of kinky soul are we dealing with here? Best not go there, we’re only a PG-13 rating on this page. ..intriguing though….NOTE TO SELF: Get back to this in another venue*
First dates, so nerve racking aren’t they? Well at least you have the date, time and location nailed down. No doubt she is equally relieved. Then there is the “what to wear” dilemma, don’t want to over dress, but don’t wish to under dress either. After all, no shoes, no shirt can and does apply to a first date as well. But how much shirt? For women it really is a tough time of decision making. Shave the back or braid and bead the hair? Show the tattoos of all the ex’s names, or not? What of the body piercings? Will that freak him out and send him running? Choosing between favorite fuzzy slippers, 8 inch stripper stilettos or combat boots. It is SO difficult sometimes. Though
Helga, Marvi Marti is confident you will both chose wisely so as not to have to contend with possible wardrobe malfunctions or critical first impression misunderstandings. *2nd NOTE TO SELF: Tell Helga not to put that pink streak in her hair and keep the twins IN her shirt this time to avoid further arrests*
Well my dear Chuck, sounds like things are off to a good start in the right direction toward a
possible train wreck of your life as you know it positively marvelous, significant change in life for you both! Keep in touch, darling!