Home late, up entirely too early (such is life with cats) and now mulling over much in my mind. Had couple cups of coffee with mom and Diva Boo, but now just sitting here thinking…and thinking some more. It is what I do on Saturday mornings, contemplate the events of the week, and process it all. I am in serious processing mode today. I NEED some road therapy, and very much hoped to be on the back of Mr. Wonderful’s bike today riding off in any old direction until we felt like turning around and coming back. Unfortunately he wrestles tonight and so that won’t work out. That sucks, he is always good for helping me sort out my thoughts and asks the pointed questions I so need to hear and answer sometimes. I may have to take this to floating raft therapy instead..drifting about the pool at Yatz and Angeo’s.
Long ago on another blog, at a happy and reflective time in my life, I had written about how much I LOVE railroad crossings. Trains are in my blood, my grandfather was a railroad engineer back when there were steam locomotives. Several uncles and cousins worked for the railroad over the years. I remember one night, an early anniversary dinner at The Iron Horse Inn, you could FEEL the trains coming when you were dining, and things throughout the room vibrated as they passed by. I LOVED it! When me and Prince Charming left to go to our car a train was coming and I walked over near the tracks (poor guy probably thought I was going to throw myself in front of it, as he cautioned me to back up a bit) and I stood there with my eyes closed as it roared past, absorbing the vibrations through my body, feeling the wind against my face. Tons of brute force and energy in that engine, totally outstanding! I have a friend that lives near tracks, they are probably not 20 feet from her back fence. She would laugh when we were there playing cards or eating, and I’d here the bells on the crossing a few houses down and bolt out the back door to go stand by the fence when the train went by, again closing my eyes and FEELING the tremendous power of the engines.
Railroad crossings are my favorite break time. The lights start flashing, the gate comes down and you are stuck sitting there as the train passes, sometimes very fast and other times seemingly crawling at a snails pace. Everyone around me is rolling their eyes in their cars, I’m grinning like a kid at Christmas. The sounds of the wheels clickty clacking over the tracks is like therapy for me. From a symbolic stand point, I always take the flashing red lights to mean STOP, breathe, relax and THINK. Just sit still and evaluate life…your goals, priorities, the road you are on at the moment. Examine for just a few minutes where you are and where you are headed. REST a moment, life is going by fast, think it through. It was funny really, I would cross this set of tracks every morning and afternoon in Glendale, the same tracks that pass The Iron Horse Inn, and to get caught at the crossing was a rare treat. Lots of trains roll through but it was only every once in a while that I actually got stuck waiting for one. I took those as Divine intervention into my life to stop, think, pray, etc. for just a few minutes. Without a doubt each time it was when life was moving along fast and I wasn’t paying close enough attention to things. Red lights were a warning for me.
I pay attention to my gut now, because I learned through those many waits at the crossings to take time to pay attention to my instincts. We all have a 6th sense to us, and some are way more in tune to theirs than others. I’ve tuned mine in very clearly for the most part over the years, as it has never failed me. Like an internal traffic light, our gut instinct will flash green, yellow or red to guide us through life. I will turn to prayer and my Bible when the lights start flashing yellow or red, seeking guidance in how to proceed. I also turn to others that are not emotionally attached to situations to help me think through things, like the Divas, or Mr. Wonderful.
I have a bright yellow caution light flashing at the moment. Not a red, warning, don’t walk, but a yellow, go slow and sharpen the senses, use care and really be observant kind of light. Those lights are frustrating compared to green or red, because they are so FIXED. This instinct light doesn’t give the answers, it tells me to LOOK for them, the signs, clues, indications etc…walk but with slow, careful, cautious and very aware steps. Be on guard, DEFCON 3 internal level of alertness has been activated. Stop, look and listen…